The Road to Character

This title comes directly from that of David Brooks’ most recent book, a series of mini-biographies of people who Brooks believes embody the elusive personal quality of character. Specifically, Brooks is referring to moral character, evidenced by those who, “…possess the self-effacing virtues of people who are inclined to be useful but don’t need to prove anything to the world: humility, restraint, reticence, temperance, respect, and soft self-discipline.” These traits all deserve attention, but I will talk mainly about humility, which is a vital foundation.

These traits indicate a person who has come to terms with the world as it is, and has often (as in Brooks' examples) gone through torment and emerged a better person from the "...struggle to deepen the soul."  Brooks quotes Thomas Merton: “Souls are like athletes that need opponents worthy of them, if they are to be tried and extended and pushed to the full use of their powers.” We have seen such people, although rarely. They show great emotional balance, and an inner cohesion and integration---they act with complete integrity. There is a strong sense that they will not be easily damaged by adverse circumstances, and can be relied upon in the worst of moments.

I was struck by the fact that those portrayed were not superheroes, nor did they embody all the characteristics mentioned above. Even though they accomplished much, they had flaws. Nonetheless, they all demonstrated great inner strength, most often under conditions of extreme stress or in arduous effort that lasted for years or decades. Life’s challenges brought out the best in them, and others benefitted.

Talking about humility in the recent past, Brooks says, “…there was a moral ecology…encouraging people to be more skeptical of their desires, more aware of their own weaknesses, more intent on combating the flaws in their own natures and turning weakness into strength. People in this tradition, I thought, are less likely to feel that every thought, feeling, and achievement should be immediately shared with the world at large.”

James K. A. Smith reviews the book in the Fall, 2015 edition of “The Hedgehog Review.” According to Smith, “Those eager to read The Road to Character are likely already receptive to its argument, whereas those who inhabit the moral ecology of self-expression and so-called authenticity are also most comfortable with ironic distance and haughty confidence in their own righteousness. Brooks’ argument cuts to the root of this: There’s no character without discipline. There’s no discipline without submission. And there’s no submission without something beyond me.”

So, character requires discipline and submission to something greater than oneself. In today’s environment, discipline, submission, and self-effacement are not at all popular. Rather, the ethic is self-promotion and seeing oneself as the center of the universe---the opposite of humility. In his research, Brooks looked at this ethic and commented, “The self-effacing person is soothing and gracious, while the self-promoting person is fragile and jarring. Humility is freedom from the need to prove you are superior all the time,…”

We can see the “fragile and jarring” aspect in many people as they desperately, and futilely, try to fill an inner void with external applications. The self-promoter cannot attend to the well-being of others because he is so stressed trying to find a place for himself in life. He does not understand how the world works, and thus wastes energy and time trying to create a reality that cannot exist, running roughshod over others in his need.

Unlike the self-promoter and those with a “haughty confidence in their own righteousness,” people who focus on themselves, the humble person focuses on her obligations to others, near or far, rather than on her rights. There is a constant refrain these days about rights, at all levels and aspects of society, from families to universities to corporations. But there is hardly a whisper about our obligations to others, a view that is clearly and regrettably in bad odor. Focusing on rights divides us, while focusing on obligations unifies us.

The path to character runs right through humility.